A Va’ad United,
By Carol Daniels
It is impossible to think about our Va’a’d without remembering Linda Kriger. This Va’ad became a Va’ad while in mourning the loss of your beloved teacher Linda. After merging two classes to become one, our collective vulnerability made every Tuesday afternoon no ordinary Tuesday afternoon. We all looked forward to the moment we would be together. We worked through our pain by turning into a blessing the gift of having known Linda.
Unpredictably, our pain grew and grew each week. We were confronted with a global pandemic. We did not know what the outcome of a global pandemic would mean. Racism and racial protests were erupting everywhere. The very heart of our democracy was being challenged. What we did know was that we needed each other and the teachings of Mussar to get us through this unprecedented time in our history. We decided to not take a break and continue to meet through the summer of the pandemic. Upon completion of a three-year curriculum, we extended our studies an extra semester.
We became more than a Va’ad. Our love for each other became stronger and stronger. We trusted each other. We developed the skill to nourish and sustain each other. We got through 2020 with open hearts and extreme kindness towards each other. We came to know what it means to wear Torah as a Spiritual Garment. It was the driving force that brought us to this point.
The gift of Mussar came to Rosalind Holtzman through the years-long persistence of her friend (and first teacher) Pearl Raz. Rosalind has enjoyed a winding path of occupations, all unexpected, as a nurse, then childbirth teacher, then religious school teacher, fledgling writer of essays and most recently dedicated political activist. She lives in Elkins Park with her husband, with whom she raised two wonderful daughters, and a current herd of three cats.
“My go-to middah is Anavah [humility] reminding me that everyone is my teacher and every challenge is an opportunity to grow my soul.”
Susan McAninch is originally from Seattle, moved to Minneapolis, and finally to Lloyd Harbor, New York. Her spiritual path is broad too. From Methodism, to Catholicism, to John O’Donohue’s Anam Cara, she found G!d in each place she stopped. Susan co-edited the early edition of the CCM Newsletter along with Linda Kriger z”l. Linda was also her first Mussar teacher, and Susan remembers her as being “full of goodness, wisdom, joy and humor.”
Middah one, suffering brings me to Tov, like no other middah. I take as many deep breaths as I can. Somehow to imitatio deo comes to me. The knot in my stomach is gone. I can focus on nourishing and sustaining, to bear insults beyond understanding.
Shelley Kapnek Rosenberg, Ed.D., is a retired educator and writer. She taught children with special needs and trained teachers. Shelley wrote several nonfiction books on Jewish themes and loves starting new, creative programs. She’s devoted to her Reconstructionist synagogue, where she served as a founder and president. She’s also a member of her township Human Relations Commission. An avid traveler, Shelley visited all 7 continents, 45 states, and about 40 countries, always with a camera in hand. In retirement, she started learning to play the harp, taking Mussar classes, volunteering at the Constitution Center, and has helped start a chapter of Bend the Arc in Philly.
“I rely on Anavah/Humility to restore my semi-permeability. Knowing that everyone I meet can teach me something I need to learn, about life, love, relationships, etc., helps keep me open to looking at each person through a Torah lens and seeking whatever it is that they have to impart to me.”
Heidi Schneider is the student of Carol Daniels and Linda Kriger of blessed memory. She was introduced to CCM when Rabbi Ira Stone conducted a Shabbaton at her congregation in Minnesota. In the past year, Heidi taught Mussar classes to adults and teens with Rabbi Harold Kravitz at Adath Jeshurun Congregation. Heidi is also the chair of the Masorti Foundation for Conservative Judaism in Israel and served as president of Adath Jeshurun. She is a volunteer speaker in Minnesota public and private schools on behalf of the Jewish Community Relations Council of Minnesota and the Dakotas.
“I keep the passuk for the middah of Bitachon on a post-it note on my desk to remind me that worry is an opportunity to seek out the other and reconnect in serenity.”
Cheryl Turetsky has a M.A. in Creative Arts in Art Therapy from Hahnemann University, and a M.Ed from Arcadia University in Special Education. She is a member of Congregation Kol Ami, in Elkins Park Pennsylvania where she serves on the Art and Design Committee. She is a retired Special Education Teacher from the Philadelphia School District. Cheryl is a fine artist (acrylic painting and printing) with a solo exhibit at Kol Ami gallery and has work on display at Cheltenham Art Centre. Her work can be viewed at cheryljturetsky.artpickle.com.
“My favorite middah is equanimity, as it has helped me to have the strength to deal with inconsequential things that are not worth disturbing my composure.”
Mark Mandel is a lifelong language nerd. His PhD dissertation was on American Sign Language and he has spent most of career in the field of language. Mark retired from UPenn in 2013. In 1968, he started the best 43 years of his life began when he met Rene. They had two children, Susannah and Jeremy (Sus & Jem). In 2007 they were all adopted by a cat, whom they named Ista. In the course of time Sus and Jem grew up and moved out into their own lives, and in 2011 Rene was taken by metastatic colon cancer, so for the past decade Ista and Mark have been live-in companions. (Photo shown with nephew Roger)
“Seder, “order”, is the middah I rely on most.”
Cathy Myrowitz discovered the Center for Contemporary Mussar through her husband Elliott, who first discovered CCM through Herb Levine as a result of their Menschwork connection. Cathy recognized this as “The Jewish tree of liveliness at work.”
“And how grateful I was because I had yet to discover deeply personal Jewish groups accessible to me. I have a chronic illness that makes leaving my home a great challenge. Given the changes in my life during the last seven years, Mussar is a way to rediscover the self as an active participant in the lives of others.”
Myra Peskowitz came to CCM with about ten years of mussar experience. She was attracted to CCM by Rabbi Stone’s writings which she found on the internet and in his book A Responsible Life. She already felt the positive force of Mussar in her life was taken by the singular focus that CCM places on sharing the burden of the other as a way of improving ourselves. Prior to CCM experience she did it the other way around: she improved herself and then saw the benefit to the other. The CCM approach finished the circle for her. Sharing the burden of the other as a priority, then improved her. It doubled the benefit.
My go to middot are always humility and silence. When I am feeling rigid or porous, being quiet and thinking about what I am learning about and from the other person helps me to find my middle ground so that I don’t over or under react.
Audrey Fingerhood is a happily retired attorney who finds that Mussar makes her life holy.
“Shtikah is my go-to middah; the better to listen to and hear the other.”
Also graduating member of this Va’ad:
Kim Decker
Additional creative contributions from this Va’ad:
Derekh haRachamim, by Carol Myrowitz
Mussar
refines through me
dust of diamonds
brilliance
from eternal time
the patience of angels
to receive
abiding truths
burnished over centuries
l’dor vador
legacy and loss.
Linda of blessed memory
Energy on a journey
not gone.
Carol
our jewel
brilliant and steadfast
through the unbearable
her Others our Other
Ani l’dodi v’dodi li
A tender, fierce
and curious
chevruta
sacred offering
from the One
ever changing
ever constant.
Vaad
each blessed one
open, open
becoming, becoming
hesed v’ hesed
salvanut for one another
gratitude above all
for this one last chance
(not as in forever)
to be for each other.
You are my Beloveds
My Beloveds mine.
Artwork by Cheryl Turetsky
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